Out of all the things no one told me before I entered the hallowed halls of the mommy-hood, the most significant omission was about the bathroom.
How it would become sacred space.
Since I've been a mother, I've noticed that there is no such thing as bathroom privacy. I will be sitting, unsuspectingly, and my son will burst in with questions. Then my nephew will have to wash his hands or tell me something or just be in there with me. Other kin-children will stick their heads in to voice their requests.
When I am in the tub, they wander in to use the bathroom--though there is a half-bath here, also. Every question, every concern becomes urgent when mama is in the bathroom. They need to know now!
Conversely, the bathroom with locked door has become a business and social space. Where do I take important calls? Where did I proofread my last conference paper?
Yep, you guessed it.
My sister and I sequester ourselves there to talk and catch up. The other day, I was in the tub and she sat on the toilet to tell me what had been going on in her life. The bathroom has become her refuge, as well. With a new baby, a sorta-jealous seven-year-old, and a talkative fiance, she literally escapes to the bathroom for a break--though her fiance, like many significant others, will follow her in there sometimes, too.
She's an avid reader who now gets most of her reading done in the bathroom. I've been known to finish a novel or two in there myself.
As we sat there, one boy or the other began to knock on the door.
"Go away!" she yelled, but stood up to go see what they wanted.
I stopped her, said something to the effect of "We should ban them when we're in here."
"Girl, please," she said, "I remember getting in the tub with mama."
LOL I found that out real quick when my first son was born and in a walker, he would BAM BAM BAM BAM on the door if I dared to close it to do my business (and eventually start crying if I took too long). I got in the habit of leaving it open all the time, and on rare occasion I forget and still do it now, only my kids are 17 and 15 and if they happen to walk by are like, Ewwwwwww! Shut the door mom! Darned kids! It's their fault that I ever do it at all, I was properly discreet about going to the bathroom before them!
I just gave you an award over at my place. Enjoy!
And, have I mentioned that no matter how fraught a post might be, I still smile when I see all of the yellow and the pretty butterfly.
Can I ever relate..someone is always standing outside while I am trying to use the bathroom. I don't even remember the last time I had any peace in there, and that includes from my honey who suddenly cannot find his socks are something ridiculous the minute I enter that room.
Are you kidding??? I get NO privacy in there. My five year old TRIES to remember that little boys don't need to see their mother's without clothes on, but sometimes things just can't wait til I'm done in the shower. You know, like him not being able to find his one of his 800 spiderman figures. Or his needing to announce that he didn't get in trouble at school. You know...important stuff. And the short one (my one year old) cannot stand not being able to at least see where I am. So forget about using the restroom in peace.
The funniest thing with having two boys joined at my hip all the time is that I always have to go in public restrooms with them in tow. It's always a task to hover over the seat, hold the baby upright to block him from trying to crawl on the nasty floor, and make sure the five year old faces the wall but doesn't touch it.
Not a fun task! Although it's easier now that the baby can walk - before then.....not fun! LOL!
I recently celebrated a new lock on our bathroom door. Finally I had reached the point where they couldn't just walk in at their pleasure. This morning I awoke to find out that one of the "men" has broken my new precious lock. So much for being alone.
lmao @ y'all. I knew I wasn't alone!!!!
Why is it so necessary that they see us/be able to reach us at all times?
I notice that we all have sons and my sister always says, "Boys want to be the center of your attention."
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