...that makes you break off your acrylic fingernails so you can give into the desire to nervously chew your real nails into inexistence.
...heralded by your son's report card on Thursday that made you wonder (shame on you), "Lord, did this child inherit anything from me?"
...in which the good news that your department was guaranteeing you funding in the spring was offset by the facts that: 1) said funding comes with a waiver of out of state fees 2) said waiver increases your financial aid 3) hellish financial aid office decides you have been overawarded 4) said financial aid office returns your $2000 loan 5) you now immediately owe the university $2000, $1600 of which is "past due." Irony? I may be dropped from my hours which means I won't have funding/a job, which means I won't get the waiver, which makes all this redundant.
... during which you realize that without the acrylic nails, you can't engage in your other nervous habit--yanking out your eyelashes.
...in which you finish hand writing your revisions and are too tired to type them up.
...in which your increasingly insignificant other pisses you off further.
...during which you learn not only does being fat mean you must be unhealthy, it means you are misshapen (check the comments) and use more than your fair share of gasoline. Just so I can beat them to it, let me admit that I also tell little kids there is no Santa Claus, once stole from the tooth fairy, won't be a virgin if I get married, and single-handedly threw the 2000 presidential election. And my misdeeds ain't over because I'm not ready to sing.
...where you get to the library on Sunday at seven and all the close, well-lit parking spots are taken. Now, since you didn't really want to go, imagine what you have to bribe yourself with to stay.
...in which your use of the word "bitch" spikes exponentially as you use it randomly toward drivers, irksome family members, people blocking the aisle at the grocery store and your sister who's in the same mood as you.
...that ends with the observation, "I know damned well it ain't Monday again!"